…people bustling…trees rustling…

Archive for November, 2015

USB

The USB should take up the “Connecting People” tagline now that Nokia is ancient history. Ancient history; we will find fossils of these devices millions of years from now. A Nokia cannot be destroyed. The Internet will attest to that.

The USB is universal indeed. On the panel to my right, there are five electrical outlets. The American, the UK, the European, the Japanese and the Universal. Serial Bus. I thought the European and the UK were the same. Anyway, all I’m really using it for is charging my Android phone. Android phones mostly use public standards.

Public standards are wonderful. The public’s standards should reflect this. Standards always work, regardless of enhancements and deviations. Standards are tolerant, neutral and secular. They let you do your thing and all they ask for in return is compatibility. People need standards.

What are standards really? A set of guidelines agreed upon by most people to facilitate harmonious co-existence. Like the USB.

Universal. Simple. Beautiful.

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Hello

I am looking up Adele’s new song lyrics. Hello from the other side and all that. I do not understand why she is so keen on telling us about her love and her life. She released 21, and then 4 years later she released 25. I do not understand why she is so keen on telling us how good at math she is. Rumor has it that this time SHE broke someone’s heart. Someone like her. Make up your mind, woman. We haven’t got all day. And why do you use a flip phone?

The only reason I am writing this is that I like the way I am pounding on the keys of my stupid laptop threatening to break it. There is an inexplicable satisfaction derived from furious typing. Unnecessary, but the fury road is the one less taken and usually makes all the difference.

It might appear that I have been completely out of touch with the reader of this silly blog, but I have been meaning to update for ages. I have scraps and snippets all over my mail drafts and other virtual note-taking tools which I systematically deleted right before typing this little piece of text.

Okay I lied. I was actually busy training velociraptors to fight a genetic mess that is the Indomitable Rex. No wait, that was Chris Pratt. What was I doing then? Shake Shack is not that good, by the way. The fries were mushy and the burger was probably a nibble and a half.

Let’s see now… what else did I do with my life this year? Wait, is this supposed to be an end-of-year post? I think my rants were relatively shorter this year compared to previous years. I think that is because all I did this year was watch Jurassic World, not watch Mad Max and ‘discover’ Adele all over again. Why am I broke then? Wait, I am broke?!

I think I should buy the Stratocaster. Why shouldn’t I after all?

Speaking of cheap stuff, it is sad that Chipotle has had to shut down outlets due to contamination scares. I hope they recover and come back stronger. Chipotle literally saves lives by existing. It is hard to say the same about other fast-food chains. Someone on my Facebook said prosperity is when you don’t think twice about adding guacamole to your burrito bowl for $1.95. I would like to add that content is when you get to enjoy that bowl watching Jon Stewart clips on your dining table. Yup. I have a dining table. Deal with it.

And I wonder why I am broke. Sigh.

I knew Arsenal would eventually fall to mighty Bayern, thanks to the usual, clockwork-like injury patterns in the team. I am however extremely appreciative, in fact, emotionally indebted to you, Arsenal, for that splendid reverse tie at the Emirates. Also the one against United. I think we, as Arsenal fans, are good for a couple of years. Everything else you do now is a bonus. So, thanks.

I don’t know why, but I chose to write this here so that you can read it instead of directly emailing it to you. It probably means I still hope against all logic that you are not the only reader of this rantage. It’s not a real word. Duh!

Haha! You thought the “reader” in paragraph 3 was a typo, didn’t you?